Thursday, October 27, 2005


Scotts way of apologizing to me was by sending me a text message on my cell. He never once brought it up when he picked me up from work. He acted as if nothing had happened.

Last night was bowling night and it was so much fun trying to put on a smiley face like I normally have. Our bowling partners don't need to know of our problems. I may share with the internet world but that is totally different. I don't know how, it just is.

So, according to him we are ok. Which we are ok but I want us to be good. Is that strange. My first marriage was just ok at its best.

I didn't mention it either. I figure when it gets to the point where I am totally stressed out, not sleeping at all, and my hair is totally gray he might then decide that I do need help with our finances.

He was asked to do a pick up for a couple of companies that required him to go to Albuquerque today. The job pays $100, you use their vehicle, and they pay for the gas and one meal. It could turn into a permanent part time job. That would be wonderful. I have tried to explain if we could bring in another couple hundred a month I would quit stressing. Especially since a large loan we had will be paid off in 2 months. That right there will help but for now the next two months, with Christmas and 2 birthdays coming, I'm feeling the stress.

When I went to bed last night I finished reading The Lake House by James Patterson and then lay there on my side staring at the clock for almost 3 hours before I drifted off. I am just too tired right now.

In other news, the kids mid-term report cards came home and both are getting A's and B's. YEA. Emma is always so worried about getting bad grades but she always does so good in school. Both kids got A's on those stupid landforms we did. I can only imagine what future projects will bring.

Time to try to study more on my management course.

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